On 7 Mar 2004 08:46:38 -0800, japanskeptic@yahoo.com (X Japan) brought
down from the Mount tablets inscribed:

>Here's my situation:
>
>My wife, who is Japanese (I am American) is a possessive, jealous,
>angry women who hits and screams at our 2 babies. She doesn't work,
>doesn't do housework, and mostly sits around all day screaming at the
>kids and watching TV. (By the way, we are now in the U.S.).
>
>When I tell her to STOP hitting, slapping and screaming at our 2
>babies (one is 6 months, the other 18), she flatly refuses, saying
>that is "Japanese Way". I am ready to call the cops, the situation has
>become so bad. And yet she flatly refuses to stop slapping, saying
>this is "Japanese Way".
>
>I always feel uncomfortable lately, especially if I am returning from
>work,
>because she'll be waiting at home in a rage -- possibly hitting my
>kids all the while.

You feel "uncomfortable"? How do you think the toddler and the infant
feel getting the shit slapped out of them all day for no fucking
reason other than that they have the misfortune of having a mother who
either was brought up that way or who has gone nutso from the stress
of adapting to motherhood in a foreign land?

If she is slapping them around and you know about and leave them there
to be slapped around, you may as well be the one doing the slapping
yourself. It amounts to the same damned thing.

This has jackshit to do with the cultural differences of the parents.
This is child abuse, plain and simple. You need to remove either the
kids or the abusive parent from the equation until the urge to abuse
has been removed from the abusive parent.

>
>If anyone in this group can give me some good advice or resources, I
>would be eternally grateful. Thanks very much. If anyone can read
>Japanese, I would love to show my wife some web sites or literature
>showing her that spanking/slapping, especially in the case of babies,
>is both stupid and dangerous.
>
>Also, I would like to hear from some Japanese folks on this board. Is
>this REALLY the Japanese Way, or this a sad excuse from my wife in
>order to justify her atrocious temper?
>
>While an American-style threat (calling the cops) seems to have no
>effect on her behaviour, is there any Japanese technique (shaming) I
>could use to stop the slapping?

Have you just "threatened" to call the cops? Or have you had her led
away in handcuffs and booked? Big difference. An oft-repeated but
never enacted threat is worse than useless.

Ideally, of course, you should get her some psychiatric help, but I
have doubts that she would go for it, or that it would do any good. It
sounds to me like you have on your hands a Japanese woman who is
steadily going psycho from not adapting to life outside Japan very
well.
>
>BE ASSURED: I am no troll. You can email me personally if you want
>more details on our situation.

The only details I would like are your name and address so I know
where to send the child welfare people and the cops.






--

Michael Cash

"I am sorry, Mr. Cash, but we are unable to accept your rap sheet in lieu of
a high school transcript."

                                Dr. Howard Sprague
                                Dean of Admissions
                                Mount Pilot College