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A Sound Theory on the Virtue of Beer 

A herd of buffalo can move only as fast as
the slowest buffalo. When the herd is hunted,
it is the slowest and weakest ones at the back
that are killed first. This natural selection
is good for the herd as a whole, because the
general speed and health of the whole group keeps
improving by the regular killing of the weakest
members. 

In much the same way the human brain can only
operate as fast as the slowest brain cells. Excessive
intake of alcohol, we all know, kills brain cells,
but naturally it attacks the slowest and weakest
brain cells first. In this way regular consumption
of beer eliminates the weaker brain cells, making
the brain a faster and more efficient machine.
That's why you always feel smarter after a few
beers, and that's why beer is so GOOD for you!