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____________________________________________________________
Morals are good - Aren't they? 

The teacher gave her fifth grade class an assignment:
Get their parents to tell them a story with a
moral at the end of it. The next day the kids
came back and one by one began to tell their
stories. 

Kathy said, "My father's a farmer and we have
a lot of egg-laying hens. One time we were taking
our eggs to market in a basket on the front seat
of the pickup when we hit a bump in the road
and all the eggs went flying and broke and made
a mess." 

"And what's the moral of the story?" asked
the teacher. 

"Don't put all your eggs in one basket!" 

"Very good," said the teacher. "Now, Lucy?"


"Our family are farmers too. But we raise chickens
for the meat market. We had a dozen eggs one
time, but when they hatched we only got ten live
chicks. And the moral to this story is, don't
count your chickens until they hatch." 

"That was a fine story Lucy." "Johnny, do you
have a story to share?" 

"Yes, ma'am, my daddy told me this story about
my Aunt Karen. Aunt Karen was a flight engineer
in Desert Storm; her plane got hit. She had to
bail out over enemy territory and all she had
was a bottle of whiskey, a machine gun; a machete.
She drank the whiskey on the way down so it wouldn't
break; then she landed right in the middle of
100 enemy troops. She killed seventy of them
with the machine gun until she ran out of bullets,
then she killed twenty more with the machete
till the blade broke; then she killed the last
ten with her bare hands. 

"Good heavens," said the horrified teacher,
"What kind of moral did your daddy tell you from
that horrible story?" 

"Don't screw with Aunt Karen when she's been
drinking!"