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A very traditional elderly woman was enjoying a good game
of bridge with her girlfriends one evening. "Oh, no! I
have to rush home and fix dinner for my husband! He's going
to really ticked if it's not ready on time!" she exclaimed
suddenly. 

When she got home, she realized that she didn't have
enough time to go to the supermarket, and all she had in
the cupboard was a wilted lettuce leaf, an egg, and a can
of cat food. In a panic, she opened the can of cat food,
stirred in the egg, and garnished it with the lettuce leaf
just as her husband pulled up. 

She greeted her husband and then watched in horror as
he sat down to his dinner. To her surprise, the husband
really enjoyed his dinner. "Darling, this is the best dinner
you have made for me in forty years of marriage. You can
make this for me any old day." 

Needless to say, every bridge night from then on, the
woman made her husband the same dish. She told her bridge
cronies about it and they were all horrified. 

"You're going to kill him!" they exclaimed. 

Two months later, her husband died. 

The women were sitting around the table playing bridge
when one of the cronies said, "You killed him! We told
you that feeding him that cat food every week would do
him in! How can you just sit there so calmly and play bridge
knowing you murdered your husband?" 

The wife stoically replied, "I didn't kill him. He fell
off the mantel while he was cleaning himself."