Ryan Ginstrom <ginstrom@hotmail.com> wrote:

> " Louise Bremner" <dame_zumari@yahoo.com> wrote in message
> news:1g54jcc.1w9fxzi14j0h1lN%dame_zumari@yahoo.com...
> > John W. <worthj1970@yahoo.komm> wrote:
> >
> > > Bad enough that he didn't help out, didn't hold the door or something,
> > > but he actually pushed his way through like she was holding the door
> > > for him.

> > Yup--standard. I've felt like holding my foot out to trip the guy
> > ("whups, sorry, I didn't see you"), but haven't dared so far.
> 
> Back in the day, I had all kinds of tricks. Perhaps my favorite was giving
> the guy a "flat tire" -- stepping on his heel in just the right way so that
> it deshoed him, or flattened the heel so his foot stuck out. Of course this
> was always followed by a profuse apology.
> 
> Perhaps my best/worse episode of all was sitting on this guy who was taking
> up three seats on the bus (legs and arms spread wide to take up all of a
> three-seater). I told him "sumimasen, suwaritain dakedo," and of course he
> studiously ignored me. So I give him a "ja, suwarimasu," turned around, and
> plopped right down on top of him. It was like one of those cartoons when a
> guy gets a piano dropped on him, you only saw some skinny arms and legs
> sticking out, flailing helplessly. I gave my profuse apology bit, squeezed
> into the seat, then gave him a kind of hip check that knocked him into the
> partition thingie at the far side of the seat. He really looked like a fly
> that had been thwacked with a flyswatter, his sunglasses were on crooked and
> everything.

Hehehe....

I was carrying a heavy bag full of rewriting work (yuk) on a shoulder
strap, when I saw one of those "gentlemen" on the train--only taking up
two seats, but with his legs spread wide (with a completely flat expanse
between them, so I don't know what he was trying to show off). So I did
the hand-chopping gesture and said "sumimasen". He looked straight
ahead, while the woman on the other side of the gap tried her best to
move far enough to give me room. I wanted to push his leg aside, but he
was wearing nasty pond-green polyester trousers that I didn't want to
touch, so I swung the bag off my shoulder to use as a pusher instead.
The train started and I was already off balance, so I started falling
towards him, with my outstretched hand heading straight for the center
of those slimy-looking trousers. I told you I did'nt want to touch them?
I was proud of the way I managed to swerve just far enough that my hand
landed hard on the edge of the seat with all my weight behind it (not
sure where the bag went). That made him move--he was cuddling up so
tight to the guy on the other side, he was getting filthy looks. It
probably didn't help that the people opposite were laughing openly....

> The catharsis from that event lasted me quite a while...

Yessssssss!
________________________________________________________________________
                   Louise Bremner (log at gol dot com)
   If you want a reply by e-mail, don't write to my Yahoo address!