Path: ccsf.homeunix.org!ccsf.homeunix.org!news1.wakwak.com!nf1.xephion.ne.jp!onion.ish.org!onodera-news!newsfeed.media.kyoto-u.ac.jp!news-spur1.maxwell.syr.edu!news.maxwell.syr.edu!small1.nntp.aus1.giganews.com!border1.nntp.aus1.giganews.com!intern1.nntp.aus1.giganews.com!nntp.giganews.com!nntp.comcast.com!news.comcast.com.POSTED!not-for-mail NNTP-Posting-Date: Thu, 21 Aug 2003 01:58:15 -0500 From: (KenFuny) Newsgroups: fj.jokes.d Subject: Signs Message-ID: Date: Thu, 21 Aug 2003 01:58:15 -0500 Lines: 65 NNTP-Posting-Host: 68.62.130.173 X-Trace: sv3-A0R+AHoEIhNY2EHL0XCXBa1yxYloysjEJjJDrUFNAPMMfMVziU6AQlD8spbM1verZWr7AV/cvknVM6l!7/EuQ/UoGPP8H0MDuDj0Fa3+5Xf2jWf/ELEgiMjLlzH4dNwZ2j8wxfjd46XkZw== X-Complaints-To: abuse@comcast.net X-DMCA-Complaints-To: dmca@comcast.net X-Abuse-and-DMCA-Info: Please be sure to forward a copy of ALL headers X-Abuse-and-DMCA-Info: Otherwise we will be unable to process your complaint properly X-Postfilter: 1.1 Xref: ccsf.homeunix.org fj.jokes.d:783 Joke is at the bottom! Subcribe to KenFuny A daily joke list aimed at lifting your spirits. Send a blank email to: subscribe@kenfuny.com Emails to this address are not read. Emailing this address will automaticly subscribe you. Important: If you are going to email from your news reader be sure it is set-up with your correct email address. National AVON Rep - for info send blank email to: AguyInfo@Comcast.net ____________________________________________________________ Signs On a New York convalescent home: "For the sick and tired of the Episcopal Church." On a Maine shop: "Our motto is to give our customers the lowest possible prices and workmanship." At a number of military bases: "Restricted to unauthorized personnel." On a display of "I love you only" Valentine cards: "Now available in multi-packs." In the window of a Kentucky appliance store: "Don't kill your wife. Let our washing machine do the dirty work." In a funeral parlor: "Ask about our layaway plan." In a clothing store: "Wonderful bargains for men with 16 and 17 necks." In a Tacoma, a Washington men's clothing store: "15 men's wool suits, $10. They won't last an hour!" Sign in the office of a Roman doctor: "Specialist in women and other diseases." Sign at a garage in Hertfordshire: "Please do not smoke near the pumps. If your life isn't worth anything - gas is!" Sign at a Budapest zoo: "Please do not feed the animals. If you have any suitable food, give it to the guard on duty."